He didn’t even do the f**king!

婚姻故事》,去年被炒的很热的电影,当时一直想看,前一阵看到视频网站都有片源,只是在会员基础上还要再加几块钱才能看。当时觉得太坑,想着“我就不信你还能不给看了”之后许久依然收费ing,闲着无聊便看了。

结合最近的女性权力被提上热搜的情形,深感女人接受了高等教育之后再回归家庭不仅是资源的浪费更是造成女性诸多心理问题的症结所在。古人说“女子无才便是德”,本身自然是不对的,但现实却是纵有诸多抱负和理想,回到真实的生活里时,逃不掉的依旧是亘古至今的柴米油盐酱醋茶,是平凡琐碎并且一天天重复的“日子“。

是的,这个世界上不是没有将事业家庭平衡到完美的人,我们来掰手指数一数,只怕一只手也数的过来,大多数绝大多数事业攀上高峰的,还要被”卫道夫们“”诟病“——作为女人不成家不生娃如何不完整(比如之前杨丽萍的一番言论居然过了这么多年又被翻出来,仅仅因为一条评论……),而投身到家庭生活中的女人,每天挣扎在各类家务和家事之中——心中是否也曾问过自己早知道在尚可发挥热量的时候回到这样的生活,是否后悔当年挑灯夜战只为了上个好的大学?前者享受到了事业巅峰的成就感,后者收获了什么呢?我也想知道。

大多数人都是淹没在平凡普通的生活中了吧?每日早九晚五的无味工作,回到家里还有一大摊子事情等着,也许还有同事领导追来的电话问询/追问某日工作的细节,等终于忙完了歇下来的时候,已经过了22点,明日还有新的一天的“事情”在等着,能做一件自己喜欢的事情倒也罢,如果再是一件自己并不热爱,但为了生活必须做的事情呢?

前一阵被热议的“离婚冷静期”,私以为公平起见,也该设立一个“结婚冷静期”,进入围城和拆掉围城都需要冷静期。而且这个结婚冷静期比离婚冷静期更有必要,毕竟如果没有脑子一热结婚也不会到头来需要去离婚?

影片中的男女主角最后分开了,剥离得很痛苦。其中为女方律师的一番精彩台词绝对圈粉:

People don’t accept mothers who drink too much wine and yell at their child and call him an asshole. I get it. I do it too. We can accept an imperfect dad. Let’s face it. The idea of a good father was only invented like 30 years ago. Before that, father was expected to be silent and absent and unreliable and selfish and can all say we want them to be different. But on some basic level, we accept them. We love them for their fallibilities. But people don’t absolutely accept those same faillings in mothers. We don’t accept it structurally and we don’t accept it spiritually. Because the basis of our Judeo-Christian whatever is Mary, Mother of Jesus. And she is perfect. She is a virgin who gives birth, unwaveringly supports her child and holds his body when he’s gone. And the dad isn’t there. He didn’t even do the fucking. God is in heaven. God is the father and God didn’t show up. So you have to be perfect and Charlie can be a fuck up and it doesn’t matter. You will always be held to a different and higher standard. And it’s fucked up, but that’s the way it is.


是不是要点击“发布”按钮,我也是斟酌了很久。
六月已经过去三分之二,疫情大有反扑之势,一切的一切都未可知
一地鸡毛也罢
诗和远方也行
到头来不过是一抔黄土而已。